Friday, 25 January 2013

winter weather

I think today is supposed to be winter's last blast. I hope so, it seems to have been going on forever. I am beginning to struggle to keep cheerful in any way but hopefully spring will come eventually. I think having had no summer last year - it just rained endlessly - and having only had a short holiday in Spain this time has made this winter just feel endless. I think I have read myself almost to a standstill, I can't seem to knit or sew without making endless mistakes, and my brain feels as though it is turning into mush, ie something soft and useless.
Perhaps tomorrow will be better.

Friday, 4 January 2013

New Year 2013

Like almost everyone else I hold my breath at the start of the year and wonder whether humanity will turn into the light or into darkness. The news as always seems unhappy - the present government setting people against each other, the rape in India which was so horrific is has brought rioting to Indian cities, the legacy of James Saville esq and his murky ways which have, despite the murk, illuminated other murky individuals.

Personally I am trying to turn into the light. I am trying to see what it is that might bring fulfillment. So these are in lieu of new years resolutions!

1. Writing - this blog, my memoirs, anything but I need to write.

2. Stitching. I want to finish the pieces I have started and go on an embroidery course this summer.

3. Family. I want to learn not to miss my two kids. They are adults now, they are reasonably ok if I see them seperately from each other, but together they revert to being two children together and are objectionable if not downright tude. A little more distance might be the solution.

4. Organisation. I want to organise my home a little better, but not stress about it. It gives J no pleasure whatsoever if I do stress, and quite frankly, if he is happy with things as they are, I have to be as well. I don't have the physical strength or energy to make things perfect anyway, so why make myself miserable? So I will do what I can, when I can and not sweat the small stuff.

5. Health. I want to try to stay away from the doctor's surgery as much as possible this year. It took me a long year to get my diagnosis of cervical stenosis. I had a huge scare when a dizzy GP thought I had COPD - I think I had a URTI or that I have some form of asthma which announces itself with a dry cough. Anyway - having had the scare of my life, I just want to stay away from doctors as much as I can. I have medication to deal with pain now, and I just need to organise my days out so that I get as much rest as I need so that my pain levels stay manageable.

Other than that? I just want to learn to crochet, to knit on circular needles (!), I want to keep my book blog and to re-read as well as read. And not to spend too much money on yet more books...or wool...or fabric... And I want to listen to my CD collection.

But my main desire is to finally write.
And so I will